Two Girls, a Book, and MiddleEarth
by hobbitgirls
Summary: *COMPLETE!* Ok, you asked for it and here we give it to you. It's the sequel to How Two Girls Wreak Havoc on Middle-Earth. Vanessa and Christy are back! *Grins evily* It's just as funny as the first so read it!
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1: Default Chapter

A/N: Second fic, read "How Two Girls Wreak Havoc on Middle-Earth." So, now, to quote Dom, "Strap yourselves in. It's going to be a long ride, but I'll tell you what, it's going to be enjoyable!" Christy's POV.

"OMG! I miss Merry!" I moaned to Vanessa, who I was talking to on the phone, as I packed to spend the night at her house. It was my "birthday party," which consisted of me and Vanessa watching and talking about LOTR.

"Speaking of Merry, have you thought any more about his proposal?" she asked.

"Umm… no… I still don't know what to say, even if we do go back to Middle-Earth! Do I need to bring anything special?"

"Yeah, sure. Bring your dress that we made. Hey, I got to go. Slick has a vet check up, so we'll be there in about an hour," she told me.

"OK, bye! See ya later."

~Later~

"Hey, that didn't happen!" Vanessa cried indignantly as Gandalf made Merry and Pippin wash, rinse, dry, and put up the dishes.

"That's because we were there, dummy!" I reminded her. "And we were wearing these dresses too." I indicated the dresses that we had made during our stay in the Shire. I had my bluish grey one and she had her green one on, which she had persuaded me to wear. 

"I know, and I wanna go see my Pip! I miss him and his kisses cuz he kisses so goooood!"

"Maybe, but not as good as Merry kisses! Ohh, I miss him so much! I miss my hot…sexy…wonderful…Hobbit," I finished quickly after a look from Vanessa.

"I wonder if that book would work again," she thought aloud.

"I dunno. Go get it and we'll see," I told her. When she had brought it out we counted to three and opened it. Instantly, the starbursts of psychedelic purple made reappearance as we were, once again, transported to Middle-Earth.

"Now, where in Middle-Earth are we?" Vanessa inquired, facing me.

"Rivendell!" I announced pointing behind her. "I wonder…has the Fellowship been formed yet?"

"I don't know, let's find out!"

"Yeah!" I yelled (sorry, Gimli moment)

A/N: Well, Nessie, has it been formed yet? And what's Rivendell like? Tell me! I must know! PS: Sorry for the shortness.


	2. Chapter 2 As if you couldn't tell

Chapter 2

A/N: I'm in science so I don't have long. Thank you _so much Coach T. This chapter will be kinda weird just to warn you. Nessie's POV._

We walked around until we saw someone we recognized.

"Look! It's Boromir! Let's go say hi," I said, pointing to a man staring out into space.

We walked over to him and introduced ourselves.

"Who are you? What are you? What are you doing here?"

"Espera. Espera uno momento por favor," I said. "Uhh sorry. Too much time in Spanish class."

Christy answered for me. "I'm Christy and this is my friend Vanessa. We're humans just like you but from a different world. We're here to see the Halflings."

"We've had a lot of people here to see the elf. Not many come to see the hobbits though."

"Well we did," I said. "Do you know where the ones they call Merry and Pippin are?" 

"I unfortunately know not their names. I did see four of them go sit over there though," he pointed.

"Thank you, Boromir," I said and we left in search of our hobbits.

"I can't wait to see Merry!" Christy squealed.

"I know! I just hope Pippin didn't forget me," I said quietly.

"How could he forget you? You and he were like inseparable!"

"I know, but a lot may have happened."

"I doubt it."

We turned the corner and I held my breath. There, sitting on the bench, was Merry and Pippin. I squeaked.

Merry looked up, did a double take, and ran over to Christy. "Christy!!" he yelled.

Pippin, looking over to see what his cousin was yelling about, saw me and came running as fast as his little legs would allow. "Nessa!" and he knocked me over he hugged me so hard.

"Ow! I guess he missed me, Christy," I called over to my friend as I was lying on the ground. 

"I told you! He couldn't forget _that face. Hehe."_

"Hey! Butt-munch."

We all sat and talked for a while. "Where's Frodo and Sam?" I asked.

"We saw them walk over there," Merry pointed to a semi-hidden path.

"We were going to follow them but then you two arrived," Pippin added.

"Let's go find them!" I said, grabbing Pippin's hand and Christy doing the same with Merry.

We found them in an area hidden by many trees. There were a lot of people gathered.

"What are they doing?" Merry asked.

"I think it's the council of Elrond!" Christy exclaimed.

"Cool!" I squealed.

We stood behind a couple pillars, spying on the council. It was fun.

"The ring must be destroyed," Elrond said in his 'look-at-me-I'm-an-elf' voice. I knew what we were going to mess with something today. I didn't know how or even what but since we were here we were going to screw around a bit with the movie.

A/N: I know, I know. It sucked. Sorry. I've been really busy and I'm really stressed out. Your turn Christy! What do we do???


	3. Fellowship Dealyo

Chapter 3

A/N: This might be interesting because I'm so tired/stressed. (High school sux!)

We watched the Council for quite a while. We got so enthralled that, even though Vanessa and I knew it was coming, Sam scared us as he jumped out from behind the bushes.

"Mr. Frodo's not going anywhere without me," Sam said, standing next to Frodo, crossing his arms across his chest to show he couldn't be moved.  
  


"Of course not," Elrond replied, drawing a smile from Sam. "It is hardly possible to separate you two, even when he is summoned to a secret council and you are not." Sam's smile got a little sheepish then.

"Oi! We're coming too!" Merry yelled grabbing my hand and dragging me out as Pippin did the same to Vanessa. "You'd have to tie us up in a sack to stop us!'

I looked at Elrond as we ran by and he had an 'Oh, Eru! Why me?' look on his face. Vanessa and I ended up next to each other, behind the hobbits.

"Besides, you need people of intelligence on this mission...quest…thing!" Pippin pleaded to be included.

"Ahh isn't that cute!" I facetiously whispered.

"Shut up!" she whispered back as Merry told his cousin, "Well that rules you out, Pip!"

Elrond looked thoughtful for a moment. Then he held up his hands and counted on his fingers. "1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…what comes after 9…oh…8…9 (sorry the fellowship had to stay at nine and I thought it was funny). So, nine people…how many ringwraiths are there? Let's see…There's Bob…Larry…Moe…Curly…Daniel…Drew…uhh…George…Matt…and Pete," he finished talking to himself. Then he said in his 'I-am-almighty-elf-worship-me' stance, "So be it. You shall be the Fellowship of the Ring."

"You hear that, Pip? We're part of the Fellowship!" Merry whispered excitedly.

"Great!" Pippin said aloud. "So, where are we going?"

"Don't worry about it," Vanessa answered. "I'll explain everything later."

"Yeah, right now I want to get out of this dress! Dresses (and skirts) are torture devices created by men!" I ranted. A little more calmly, I explained. "And if we are going to be part of the fellowship we have to be able to move around!"

"That's right!" Vanessa hurriedly agreed.

"OK!" Merry and Pippin replied, dragging us away, eager to help.

A/N: I know it was kinda dumb, but I have no time and I have Biology work I need to do. Well, what happens next, Nessa?


	4. Even More Fan Girls

Chapter 4

A/n: What happened to Kits? I thought she was going to be in it. I loved your 1…2…3 thing and naming the ringwraiths! Ha! I laughed my pants off (which John enjoyed watching! J/J!) Nessa's POV.

"Christy? I hate dresses! Get me out! NOW!!!" I screamed. "Do you know what else I hate? Milk and lunch ladies. Grrr…"

"Whoa, Nessa. Calm down. We'll get you out soon enough."

We were still being led by our hobbits to a room so we could change. We came to our room and set out were two sets of clothes for us.

"OK, change," Pippin said to me.

"OK! Nessa's going strippin'!"

"NO!!!" Christy screamed. "Seeing you strip is something I never want to see."

"No! Him, maybe, but not me," she pointed at Pippin when she said this. Pippin just stood in the corner looking hopeful.

"Sorry guys. Christy says no," I said sounding put out. I looked over at Pippin and said quietly, "It'll come later," and winked.

"I heard that!" Christy stated.

"You never let me have any fun," I said laughing.

"Not that kind of 'fun,'" and threw a pillow at me.

We walked out 10 minutes later.

"I look like an elf!" Christy cried.

"A manly elf," I commented.

"Shut up! You look just the same."

"But I look good in it," I said, grinning. All she did was stick her tongue out at me; which I returned.

We met up with the hobbits and hugged blah blah blah, you know.

"So we're part of the fellowship, huh?" I asked.

"I guess so Nessie," my friend commented.

"When do we leave?" I asked.

"Day after tomorrow," Frodo answered. "So get some rest."

(A/N: I know in the book they sent out scouts and it took quite a long time but this is my fic and I say they leave day after tomorrow)

"OK," I said. _"Yeah right!" _I thought. _"Pippin + Me= who knows what!"_

"I'm hungry," Pippin piped in. "Let's go eat."

"I'm up for that!" I agreed.

/ \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ /

"Food...nummy…food," I said in between bites.

"My gosh, Nessa! You're almost as bad as the hobbits!" Christy exclaimed.

"What can I say? I love my food."

"Obviously!" she laughed.

Just then there was a loud bang and an equally loud squeal. "Legollllllllllaaaaaaaaaaassssssss!!!!!"

"Oh no. Another Legolas fan girl," Merry muttered.

"Do you get a lot?" I asked.

"All the time! They come, they squeal, they hug/kiss the elf, they leave," Pippin said.

"How many come a day?" Christy asked.

"About five," Merry answered.

            "Lllllleeeeegggggooooolllllaaaassss!!!" another bang and a squeal.

"Is that who I think it is?" I asked.

A/N: Sorry.


	5. Something Special

Chapter 5

A/N: Good chappie! Kinda short, but good. (Stop going BreeGirls on me!) I like the Legolas fan girl part. Hehehe! I sounded sophisticated.

"Lllleeeeggggoooolllllaaaasss!!!" we heard again. 

"Is that who I think it is?" Vanessa asked me.

"I think it is! This I gotta see!" I replied as we ran out to the courtyard. 

"It is her!" We squealed as we saw one of our friends run by.

"Her who?" Merry asked, as he and Pip arrived.

"Kitty!" Vanessa and I yelled, trying to get her attention.

"Aahhhh!!!" Legolas yelled as he too ran by.

"Hi guys," Kitty told us as she chased the poor elf around. "Legolas!"

*Bang* and she was gone. Then we heard another *bang*.

"Oh, Eru! She's back!" cried Legolas, putting back on his track shoes.

"Nope," I calmed him as I heard a familiar voice, two actually.

"Aragorn! Strider!" cried Samantha.

"Frodo!" yelled Brittany.

'There's something you don't hear very often," Merry remarked.

"Yeah, how come no one ever yells 'Merry' or 'Pippin'?" the youngest hobbit pouted.

(*Bang* *Bang* Bye Samantha! Bye Brittany!)

Vanessa and I looked at each other, counted to 3 silently and yelled.

"Merry!" "Pippin!"

The hobbits shared a look of joy and bolted, leaving us to follow.

"This is fun!" Merry told Pippin as they ran.

"We should do this more often!" Pippin agreed as Vanessa and I caught up and grabbed our men (or should I say hobbits?)

"Me gusto (I like)!" I told Vanessa.

"Me too!" she agreed whole-heartedly.

"Come, Vanessa. I have something I need to show you," Pippin said suddenly.

"Ooookkk," she agreed, raising an eyebrow. "Lead away."

As they walked away, Merry took my hand and led me to an unused bench that was fairly secluded, about half a second later we were making out.

"I love you," Merry said, mid-make out session.

"I love you too," I replied. I then thought, "But why did you stop kissing me? I love the way this hobbit kisses!"

"Then have you thought of an answer to my question?" he inquired.

"Well that killed the mod!" I thought. I then told him, "Yes, but I'm not sure I should tell you yet."

"Why not?" he demanded to know.

"Well because I'm only 15. I just turned 15 in fact. I have to be 18, at least, before I can marry you. And I need to finish school."

"Why?"

"Because if I go missing all of a sudden then my parents would launch a search party for me and it'd be bad. So just wait until I graduate in 3 years. OK?"

"Alright. If you say we must wait, we must wait. Now where were we? Ah, yes I believe it was here…" he trailed off as he kissed me.

"3 more years!" I reminded myself. "It's going to be a long 3 years!"

"Oh, Pip! It's beautiful!" Vanessa gushed, pretending she had never seen Elrond's study before.

"I know. But I need to talk to you about something," he answered.

A/N: Well, Nessie, what does he have to talk about? Sorry that the chapter was bad, but hey, I don't care right now! (I'm gonna rewrite soon of it.) 

Review me please! Because if you do, Vanessa will send you a special treat! Hehe. No, it's not anything dirty. Sheesh! You fanfic people's minds are quite dirty!!


	6. Lovey Stuff

Chapter 6

A/N: Thanx a lot Christy! What do I write? Oh well. I left you at a bad place last time. I hope this comes out OK. Nessie's POV.

Disclaimer: We own only ourselves. Got it? Everything else goes to Tolkien and his wonderful brain.

"Alright. What do you need to talk about?" I asked, wondering what could be troubling my sweet…loving…hot…sexy… (Oh, sorry) hobbit.

"I love you."

"I love you too," I said, giving him a kiss.

"You don't understand. I love you."

"Well, I love you too."

"Stay with me. After we finish our journey with Frodo and the others we can go back to the Shire and be together."

By this time the color had drained from my face and I was shaking uncontrollably. "I don't know. I have school, my horse, my friends…"

"You would have Christy," he pleaded. "Please…I've been miserable without you."

"So have I. But…I don't know…I've never been this serious with anyone. I don't know what to say."

"Say yes! Come back with me. I want to be with you forever."

"I want to be with you too! I just don't think I'm ready to stay with someone for the rest of my life. I don't think you're ready to stay with me either." 

"Why not?! I love you, you love me. Either you want to be with me or you don't."

"I do! But…" I trailed off. "OK. I guess I won't need a college degree in the Shire."

Just then Pippin pulled me into a kiss. Man that hobbit could kiss!

He started to pull away but I pulled him back. I wasn't done yet. He didn't mind it though, obviously. 

An hour later we left the library (looking dishelved. Hehehe.) and went in search of our friends. We found them sitting on a bench kissing.

I coughed to get their attention. "Someone's been busy!" I said with a smile.

"You both look like you have too," she commented looking at our messed up hair and wrinkled clothes.

"What do we do now?" Merry asked, putting his arm around Christy's shoulders.

"Food!" I exclaimed.

We made our way to the dining hall just as Elrond was about to make his opening speech. He looked at us warningly as we sat down. The elf really needs to take a breather.

I was eating with only one hand, as was Pip, because we were holding hands under the table. I noticed that Christy seemed quite content sitting next to Merry.

"Christy, I need to talk to you _alone," _and I looked at Merry and Pippin as I emfizied this word to show that it meant them.

"I need to talk to you too, Nessa. Ummm….yeah. We can meet in the courtyard after dinner."

"Ok and I gave Pip a reassuring squeeze to show that it was going to be alright. I couldn't believe I was giving up everything for him. 

Dinner finished and Christy and I headed towards the courtyard to talk but Lord Elrond stopped us. 

"Are you not staying for the dance?" he asked.

"I guess we can." I said, looking at Christy.

"Sure. We can talk later anyway."

W walked to the ballroom placy and Merry and Pippin ran up to us.

"Care to dance, milady?" Merry asked Christy elegantly and offering is arm to her.

"But of course," and, laughing, curtsied.

"Come on, Pip," I said, grabbing his hand.

We danced with our hobbits a few times when Legolas and Aragorn walked up to us and asked for a dance.

"OK!" and looked at my best friend. "You can have Strider first; he's younger than your parents," I said quietly

"Alright. You get Leggo-boy," and she was lead away by the dark haired man. Merry and Pippin stood on the side all by themselves.

"Legolas? I thought you should know, I can't dance. Never have, never will."

"That is not a problem, milady. You will learn in time," and he smiled. (He smiled?! He had an expression?! I am queen! I made the elf smile! *Does squirrel dance* Sorry, I got a little carried away.)

"Since we're going to be journeying together just call me Vanessa." I looked over at where the hobbits were standing; they weren't there. I looked around and spotted that both of them had found partners.

"Alright, Vanessa."

The song ended and Legolas and I broke apart. We walked over to Christy and Aragorn. Another song started and this time I danced with Aragorn and Christy danced with the elf.

"So how old are you exactly?" Aragorn asked.

"14 actually. I think I'm the youngest one here," I answered sheepishly.

The song ended and Pippin came running towards me even before I had broken away from my dance partner.

"Hello, Pip," I said and he put his arm around my waist to show the man that I was taken. 

"Hullo, Nessa," and he looked strangely at Strider.

"Is the dance almost over?" I asked. "We leave tomorrow don't we?"

"Ai," Strider answered. "We leave after breakfast. As for the dance, I know not, but I am leaving. Both of you should too; you're going to need your rest."

"Alright, thank you for the dance, my lord."

"Strider," he corrected.

"Then you can call me Vanessa."

"Good night than, Vanessa."

I waited for Christy in the courtyard with Pippin until she arrived. I didn't have to wait for very long, for 5 minutes later she came with Merry.

"Good night, Merry. I had a won-"

"Cut it out! We need to talk. Bye Merry. Bye Pippin!" and I pushed them towards their rooms. "Finally!"

"I wasn't done saying good-night to Merry! Humph."

"Sorry, but we gotta talk." I told her about what Pip had said to me and what my answer was.

"You're not even going to finish high school?!" she asked incredulously. "I'm waiting. You should too."

"Do you think?"

"Yes. Besides, you can't leave me to battle the evil lunch ladies by myself!"  
"I guess you're right. How am I going to break it to Pip?" I had a horrible feeling that it wasn't going to be pretty no matter how I did it.

_~~*~~_

"She's coming to the Shire with me, Mer!" Pip exclaimed to his cousin. "I asked her and she said yes!"

"I don't know, Pippin. She told Christy to wait, and if she's talking with Christy tonight, she might convince Nessa to wait too."

"What are you saying?"

"Don't get your hoes up that she's coming right away."

_~~*~~_

The next morning I woke up and went in search of my home dawgs. I found Christy and Merry together (*Cough*)

"Where's Pippin?" I asked Merry.

"Umm…I think he's packing for the journey. He's in our room if you want to find him."

"Thanks," and I walked off. I really wasn't in the mood to get yelled at but I had to do this. I found him right where Merry said he would be.

The door was open so I walked right in. "Hullo."

"Morning," he said cheerfully. "Are you almost ready to go?"

"Err...yeah. But first I need to talk to you." I saw his smile fade a little. "I talked to Christy last night. Now I talked her into waiting and she told me to wait also. I'm sorry but I'm going to wait until after high school."

"Oh. Merry said you might change your mind,' he said quietly.

"No, I'm not changing my mind. I'm, how can I put this…postponing my plans. My parents wouldn't be too happy if I stay without finishing school."

"Alright," he sighed. "I had hoped Merry would be wrong but I guess not."

"I'm sorry, but I want to wait until after I graduate. Is everything still cool between us?" I asked.

"Of course and he pulled me into a kiss. Oooo…hobbit kisses.

Twenty minutes later Christy came to the hobbit's room. "Are you guys- Oh gosh! Break it up you two! Please don't kiss in front of me."

"Hey! I watched you and Merry kiss all the time. I didn't want to see that either."

"Well, you wouldn't have to if you would jus stay in your room."

"Whatever. Is it almost time to leave yet?" I asked.

"Yeah. Get all of your stuff together. And please, don't kiss. I think I'm going to have nightmares from now on." She walked away.

"Is she gone?" Pippin asked anxiously.

"I think so." I pulled my hobbit close to me for another kiss.

"And another thing-Ahh!!" Christy screamed. "What did I tell you guys about that?!"

"Just ignore her," Pippin said to me. That I can do!

"Guys? Guys? Are you listening to me? Oh, I give up!" She walked out of the room. "Those two…"

A few minutes later everyone was packed and waiting in the courtyard to depart.

"I can't believe we're going with the fellowship!" Christy exclaimed quietly to me. 

"I know! How much do you think this'll screw with the movie?'

"I don'' know. Shh…We're about to leave."

So everyone leaves and we're on our way.

A/N: Sorry that was so long and boring for you. I think I'm losing my funny. It's all your fault, Christy! He he. Just kidding. The chapter was so long because I'm at my dad's house. Boring. So I thought 'Why not bless these people with a long chapter?' He he. Goooo Christy!!!


	7. Anger Management Please!

Chapter 7

A/N: I should do more payback and make Pip mad at you Nessa. Hmm…decisions, decisions! We'll find out won't we! Well, here we go!

Disclaimer: We own nothing good. Vanessa owns a cd and her horse. I own my pretty little binder in which we write.

"I'm tired! And I'm hungry too!" Pippin complained, for about the 1000th time that day.

"We know, you Fool of a Took!" Gandalf answered.

"Oh, this is getting on my nerves," Vanessa told me quietly. "Pip says anything and Gandalf calls him a 'Fool of a Took'!

"So you've said," I reminded her. "This is really sad. We're not even a week into the journey and already everyone's at each other's throats."

"Yeah," Vanessa agreed.

"I'm going to go talk to Merry," I excused myself. "Go talk to Pippin and see if he can complain a little bit softer so we don't have to listen to Gandalf saying 'Fool of a Took' all the way to Moria."

"Ok, see ya later," she agreed and went in search of Pippin.

_~~*~~_

"What?! I'm complaining too loud for you?!" the fellowship suddenly heard Pippin scream. Everyone looked at each other and became quiet.

"Uh-oh, Mer," I whispered.

"No, Pip. It's just I don't want Gandalf yelling at you when you complain."

"As you and Christy say, 'Whatever!' I don't care!" Pippin yelled, before Vanessa could finish explaining.

(A/N: Ooo…Revenge is so sweet! I'm having so much fun! Don't hit me Nessa! *Ducks* Ha ha!)

As Pippin stormed out, everyone suddenly sprang to life. Aragorn was talking to Boromir; Frodo, Sam, and Gandalf were discussing who knows what; Legolas and Gimli were starring daggers at each other; and Merry and I were kissing.

"Were you listening?!" Pippin screamed. We all looked at him innocently. "Oh, come on! Let's go!" he grumbled, marching ahead.

I looked at Merry and told him to go ahead because my best friend needed me and his needed him.

"Vanessa? Are you OK?" I asked as I reached the spot where I had heard the couple fighting.

"What do you think?" she said softly, looking at me with a tear streaked face.

(A/N: Now I made myself feel bad. Nessie, it's your fault though. You made me and Merry fight; now it's your turn.)

"The man (hobbit) that I love and I just got into our first fight," she continued.

"Vanessa, it's OK. It's gonna be fine. I mean, look at me and Merry. We had a huge fight (thanks to your writing skills) and we made up."

"Yeah, but Pippin's mad at me. With you and Merry it was the other way around."

"Merry's talking to Pip right now to se what's up with him. Don't worry. This journey's just really hard on everyone, which they conveniently left out of the books, and even Merry and my relationship is strained. It's OK though because your relationship will be even stronger. Just remember- 'Love conquers all.' (A/N: OMG! I sound sooooo sappy! If I ever do that again someone kill me!) Now come on before they leave us behind."

_~~*~~_ that night _~~*~~_

"Man, its cold!" I complained, cuddling closer to Merry (I now love cold weather!)

"Aye, that it is," replied Boromir, who was watching Merry and me with a strange look on his face. (Not like that pervy! Maybe it was Frodo's cooking…)

"Who's going to take first watch tonight?" Gandalf asked being the killjoy he is.

"I will," Legolas volunteered.

"I will take second watch tonight," Boromir told us.

"And I will take third watch," Aragorn concluded the conversation, as we all made our way to our bed rolls. Mine was next to Merry's for warmth (Elvish clothes aren't very thick-they don't feel the cold).

As I was getting warm, and almost asleep, I saw Vanessa lying in her bedroll, shaking like a leaf. I felt sorry for her because she didn't have anyone to cuddle with for warmth, but I wasn't giving up my heater (another thing hobbits are good for)!

(A/N: Now for the fun part! *Evil grin* hehehe)

"You look a little cold, lass," Gimli said as he was walking by to his roll.

"You think?" Vanessa replied hotly.

"You have to have a brain to think," I said, completing our joke. 

"Not funny," Gimli complained.

"All well! 'Cry me a river!'' we answered. I could feel Merry shaking beside me in silent laughter.

(A/N: I have decided not to be as mean as I had planned. Only for the fact that I do not want to die and Vanessa would kill me if she found out that this part was meant for Gimli…oops! Eheheh! See, aren't you glad I decided to play nice?)

"Vanessa," Frodo said, (I believe this is the first time he's ever talked! Gasp! Eheh!) "would you like my extra blanket?"

(A/N: I think I'm sick! I wrote/am writing something nice about Frodo! Die, EW, die!)

"No, I wouldn't want to take your blanket away from you on this cold of a night, Frodo," Vanessa replied.

"Oh, we could share it, like Christy and Merry," he insisted. Vanessa looked over at us and raised her eyebrow. Merry and I had fallen asleep, with my head on his chest, as I had been watching Gimli attempt to hit on Vanessa. 

"Uh, I don't think so…" she said, pointing at us. Just then an extremely cold blast of wind blew by. "Pip may not like this, but give me the blanket and get your bedroll." She changed her mind between chattering teeth.

"I'll explain to him that it was entirely platonic (no romantic feelings), so he won't be too mad," Frodo told her.

"Whatever. I'm going to sleep."

A/N: I had to do it, but aren't you glad I did play nice?


	8. Kiss and Makeout!

Chapter 8

A/N: Ahhh!!! Gimli…me…hitting on?! Ahhh!!! You are so mean! I'm glad you changed it to Frodo. You're so nice. (I feel like Kits) Be prepared for a weird chapter. Nessa's POV.

Disclaimer: We own nothing. So please don't sue us because we're just a group of kiddos. Don't hurt me! All I own in this Snickers bar. And no, you may not have it.

Although I didn't really want to take Frodo's blanket, I was kinda glad I did for a couple of reasons. One: he's warm. Two: He's warm and fuzzy. Three: I wanted to make Pip jealous to see me with someone else. He he he.

"Thank you for sharing with me, Frodo," I said, snuggling up next to him. _'Check me out now, Pip!' I thought. _

"Think nothing of it."

I heard Gimli mumble something next to me and rolled onto his side.

Legolas and Boromir both finished their watches and now it was Aragorn's watch. He was sitting pretty close to me and Frodo.

I woke up because I heard someone softly singing. "What song is that?" I asked, startling him.

"Nothing; just something to pass the time. Go back to sleep; you'll need your rest."

"Alright.  'Night." I turned back over and snuggled up next to Frodo again. He's so snuggly. I felt as though someone was staring at me. I blew it off thinking I was just imagining things.

I awoke the next morning and I was surprised to find that Frodo and I were still huddled close together. I moved his arm, which was around me protectively, and went to join Aragorn and Pippin who were the first to have awoken.

"Morning," I said to both of them and sat down next to Strider; I was still mad at Pippin. "Does it ever warm up here?" I asked, shivering.

"Only when we're not here," Strider joked. (Why am I the one who brightens everyone's day? I mad Legolas smile and now I made Aragorn joke. I'm so cool) Pippin just stared at him and me.

Silly hobbit! I wasn't going to let him ruin my vacation. I reached over and "accidentally" brushed Aragorn's arm. "I'm sorry!" I said, and batted my lashes at him.

I heard Pip squeak (he he). Ha! I knew he would be jealous!

Within a 15 minute period everyone in the fellowship was awake. Christy and Merry were up and 'busy'; Frodo was packing with Gimli and Legolas; Sam and Boromir were cooking; and Gandalf was sitting with Strider, Pip, and me.

"I'm seriously cold!" I said between chattering teeth.

Strider put his arm around me and pulled me close. "Better?" he asked.

"Yeah, thanks," I answered. I looked over at Pippin who just stared, open mouthed at the sight before him. I smiled.

Soon everyone was gathered around the fire and eating breakfast. For some reason Gimli insisted on sitting next to me. I was still being held by Strider, and Christy was in Merry's arms. (Aww… everyone looked so cute!) Pippin was sitting next to Merry and was shooting dirty looks at Strider. (Ooo… someone's jealous!)

"That's it! I've had it!" Pippin said getting up and grabbing me. "We're going to work this out."

"Hey! Let me go! LET ME GO!!"

He took me to a seclude area behind some trees and sat me down.

"You need to learn some manners!" I said, crossing my arms.

"We need to work this out, Nessa. I'm sorry. I guess I shouldn't have been complaining so much."

"Yeah!"

"I also should've listened to you. And for that I'm sorry."

"Well I'm glad you apologized. You're forgiven." I jumped up and knocked him over I landed on him so hard.

"How do you know I've forgiven you?" Pip asked me.

"Forgiven _me_?!" I asked incredulously. "Me?! What did _I_ do wrong?"

"You slept with Frodo," he said. "I watched you all night to make sure you didn't do anything."

"First off, I didn't 'sleep' with him; I was cold and he offered me him blanket. You don't want me to freeze do you? All we did was share a blanket. Second, you watched me all night? I thought I felt someone watching me."

"That was me," he said sheepishly. "I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions." 

"It's OK, babe," I said. He pulled me into a kiss. Ooo…hobbit kisses. Me gusto. (Ahh…my pants fell)

15 minutes later we joined the fellowship at the fire and finished breakfast. I was glad I had made up with Pippin but I was also kind of sad because that meant no more flirting with Frodo and Strider. Oh well.

Everyone finished breakfast and packed so we continued on our way. I walked with Pippin; Christy with Merry; Gimli with Legolas; Aragorn with Gandalf; Frodo with Sam; and Boromir was all alone.

Pippin and I started to drift back in the line but wherever I went, Gimli followed. I wish he would go away because he's quite annoying. He needs a girl.

When Pip and I finally did get Gimli to stop following us he held my hand. "Vanessa, I-" he started but Aragorn decided to finish his conversation with Gandalf and came to talk with me.

"Hello, Strider," I said, letting go of Pippin's hand. Oh man, they were both so hot; I didn't know who to hit on! _"Pip,"_ I thought. _"He's the one you should stay with."_

"You two shouldn't lag behind. Who knows what follows us," he said making his way in between Pippin and me.

"Alright," I answered. "You stay in back."

"I'll do it!" Gimli piped in.

"Umm…no. I'd rather Strider does it. He has um…more weapons," I said out loud to everyone. But to Strider I said, "Actually, I'm afraid he's going to stare at my butt."

"Oh, don't worry. I will stay in back."

"Good."

A/N: I am so tired. I'm going to bed. See ya. Sorry my chappie was so long and boring but that's what you get. Gooo…Christy! (I feel like a brainless cheerleader) Umm…my apologies to all you cheerleaders. ;P


	9. Too Much Rubbing Off

Chapter 9

A/N 1) Howdy all! This is Vanessa, and since I'm the one typing this fic, I'd like to take the time to thank all of the reviewers thus far.

**Frodo's Wife:** Whoa! You can have him! In 8th grade I had this whole Frodo/Elijah Wood obsession. But that was then. When Christy and I wrote this I was in my Pippin/Billy Boyd phase. But now, I'm in love with Aragorn (not Viggo, because he doesn't have the sexy goatee thingy). So you can have Frodo.

**Saiyan Jalapeno:** Thank you!!!

**Sparkly-Purple-Babe:** Wow! That's a cool name! Anyway, here's more.

A/N 2) (Christy) I hate English! I think I have writers block! Ahh!! So if this chapter sux that's why.

Disclaimer: We own nothing except what you do not recognize in the story.

After several weeks of walking we reached a hill, covered in stones and boulders, in the shadow of the Misty Mountains.

"We will rest here for a while, then continue on our path to the Gap of Rohan," Gandalf told the fellowship.

"Finally!" I exclaimed in relief, dropping onto one of the large white rocks.

"I know. My feet are killing me!" Vanessa agreed, complaining because, after all, misery loves company. And for out complaining all we received was a dirty look from Gandalf. Then Vanessa got an offer from Gimli. "I'll massage your feet for you, Vanessa."

"No, umm that's OK. I just need to sit down for a minute."

"The offer still stands, if you ever need a massage."

"Uh…thanks," Nessa told him. "Man, that's just _creepy_!" she whispered to me.

"I know. Gimli's got a crush on you!" I teased her.

"Shut up," she told me darkly, then smiled as Pippin sat down next to her. As soon as Pippin sat down, I felt a pair of arms snake their way around my waist.

"Hello, beautiful," I heard in my ear. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine. Yourself?" I asked as he sat down next to me, after giving me a kiss of course.

"Great," he said.

"I'm doing well too, if anybody cares!" Pippin interjected.

"Vanessa, you're rubbing off on that hobbit waaayyy too much," I said laughing.

"Oh look! Boromir's got his sword out, Merry. Let's go see if he'll teach us more swordplay!" Pippin begged his cousin.

Merry rolled his eyes, "OK," and the two walked off together.

"And you, Missy, are rubbing off way too much on that hobbit!"

"Yeah, well…at least they'll be well trained by the time the quest is over…" and with that we both started laughing.

Soon, Boromir, after having been begged for five minutes by Pippin, was putting the hobbit through their paces.

The whole thing with Boromir 'accidentally' hitting Pippin and Merry and Pippin attacking Boromir happened. (I, Vanessa, don't feel like writing it out because it is way too late and we all know how and why it started. So I see no point in typing it if you all know what I'm talking about. Thank you for your time, and I will drop you off at the next stop. Have a safe and fun time here in the Hobbitgirls' world. )

Frodo and Sam just looked incredulously at them, while Vanessa and I were laughing our bloody heads off. (I, Vanessa, randomly placed the word 'bloody' there even though Christy did not write it in the spiral. So that, my friends, was my doing, not hers. Mine.)

"Gentlemen, that's enough," Strider said, trying to help the other man (Meanwhile, Vanessa is drooling because Aragorn is so hot!). Merry and Pippin looked at each other, and pulled Strider's legs out from under him.

"That's my hobbit!" I said laughing, but stopped as I saw Legolas leap over the rocks (Again, Vanessa begins to drool).

"What is it?" Merry/Pippin asked.

"It's nothing. Just a wisp of cloud," Gimli answered.

"It's moving fast…against the wind," said Boromir, rising from his seat.

"Crebain, from Dunland! Hide!" Legolas told us urgently. We all quickly got our packs and hid, me with Merry, Vanessa with Pip, etcetera.

A/N: What happens now, Ness? Sorry, the bell's gonna ring and you said that you wanted the spiral. 

A/N2: Hey! Nessa here. I hit the button and whole butt load off extra white space popped up at the bottom. Now what do I do? So the chapter looks a lot longer than it really is. Just ignore it, it was my mistake. 


	10. Snowy Day!

Chapter 10

A/N: Why Gimli?! There are plenty of other men. Hot men even! Why the short, ugly, hairy guy, Christy?! Oh, yeah. I remember why. He he. I guess being hit on by Gimli was worth it then. He he. My pen smells funny if anyone cares. OK, here we go! Nessa's POV.

Disclaimer: We own only that in which you do not recognize. Everything else belongs to the Almighty Tolkien. 

_"Fun,"_ I thought. _"Hiding with Pip…alone. Too bad we're scared to death."_

"Blah, blah, blah," Gandalf said. Actually he said stuff but I wasn't listening because I was with my man.

"Vanessa? Vanessa? Vanessa!" Christy screamed at me. She does that a lot.

"What? Huh? What did I miss?"

"Obviously you weren't listening," she said. "We're leaving."

"Oh, OK."

We walked and walked and walked for days. Soon the days turned to weeks, turned to months, turned to years…oh wait. It's just my watch; it's broken. We've only been walking for few hours. We walked to the mountain thing (I don't remember what it's called) and started our long climb/walk upwards.

"My gosh! I'm freezing!" I exclaimed and Gimli sprang forward.

"I can help with that," he said to me.

"Ummm…"

"Let me do it," Pippin piped in and I let out a sigh of relief. "I have extra clothes."

Gimli mumbled something about 'never winning' and left.

Pip came over to me and held me close. "Better?" he asked. 

"Much," I replied. It was great; I had my man, my friend, and I was surrounded by some incredibly hot guys! Life was good. Except for the fact that Gimli kept staring at me and it was cold. Being cold isn't all that bad as long as you have a hobbit nearby.

Just then, Legolas cried, "There is a fell voice in the air!"

"It's Saruman!!" Gandalf yelled as a chunk of the mountain fell upon us.

I was buried in the snow but soon a gruff hand pulled me up; Gimli's. "Thanks," I mumbled.

"T'was nothing, milady," and he reached to kiss my hand.

"Where's Pippin?" I asked, quickly pulling my hand away; I didn't want to be kissed by him.

"I'm searching for him," Legolas replied from somewhere nearby. 

I began digging in the dense snow for either Christy, Merry, or Pippin. Just then Christy's head popped out of the snow. "Hullo!" I said.

"Get me out of here!" she screamed. See, I told you she screams a lot. He he he.

"Hold on, hold on. You can't have everything in life."

"When it's a life or death situation it should be!"

"Alright, alright," I dug her up and went in search of Pippin again. 

Christy found Merry and they left to 'warm each other's lips'. I still hadn't found Pippin and if I didn't find him soon I was going to flip out.

"Gandalf? Have you seen Pippin? I can't find him anywhere."

"I have not the time to worry about that Fool of a Took!"

"You're hopeless. Boromir? Have you seen him?"

He opened his cloak to reveal a shivering hobbit. "Legolas found him and handed him to me."

"Oh thank God!" I cried. "Why didn't he tell me?!" I rushed over to Pippin and held him close. "Thank you, Boromir," I said. "I got it from here."

He gave us an odd look and walked away to join Aragorn and Gandalf.

While Frodo decided to travel to Moria, Pippin and I _tried to warm up. Needless to say, it didn't work._

When everyone started to journey back down the mountain, I didn't object; it was frickin' cold! So I grabbed Pip's hand and headed started to follow everyone down.

After days of walking (and complaining) we made it Moria. The trip might have been more enjoyable (if it all possible) if Gimli would have stopped bragging to me about how we were going to meet his cousin.

"Malt beer, roaring fires, meat right off the bone…"

"That's great," I lied. I ran to catch up to Christy with Pippin in tow. "I'm really getting annoyed with that guy! Can one of you talk to him about leaving me alone?"

"I can do it," Pippin said.

"Thank you," and I kissed him, which he returned. Oooo… me gusto.

"Break it up, you two!" Christy complained. "All he's going to do is talk to 'sexy' (inside joke, please don't ask) for you."

(A/N: Aren't orcs pretty? Sorry, I'm watching LOTR. Just ignore me and my random comments. Elijah's so hot…of course I love Billy too! I need to get back to my chappie)

"So? I think he's brave to talk to that child lover! I don't think he knows how old I am."

"I'm not a child lover, am I Christy?" Merry asked quietly.

"No. Neither is Pippin; you guys are pretty young."

"Oh. Well that's good."

"Bye, Pip," I said sadly. "Have fun"

A few minutes later we heard the screams/yelling of a dwarf. Christy, Merry, and I moved towards the yelling to hear what was going on. It didn't sound too pretty on Pippin's behalf.

A/N: I'm so sorry, Christy. I gotta stop. My hand is killing me and I gotta get some sleep. I'm sorry I left you at such a bad spot. Gooo…Christy! (school! Sorry, I told you that made me feel like a cheerleader) .::You left a stain on everyone of my good days, but I'm stronger than you know!/ I got a disease! And I think that I'm sick. Wanna leave me be while my world is coming down on me. You taste like honey, honey, tell me can I be your honey?::. Sorry, I love that song. It's by Matchbox 20. I love that song! It's called Disease, if you wanna know. Nighty-night. Where did I put my teddy bear? :) Peace! He he. Sleep…Teddy! (I found him) That's it, I'm going to bed. *light clicks off* Did I tell you… *light clicks back on* about how *light clicks off again* I guess so. Where's my night light? Bye! Wow, that is one heck of an Author's Note! Oh, and could you please check out my solo fics? They're all Romances, but I don't think they're that bad. My pen name is Tap-dancing Hobbit. So if you go to find and type that in, it won't work. Yet, if you just type in Tap, it'll be the last name on the list. Thank you guys so much! PEACE!!!


	11. No Lasses

Chapter 11 A/N: That's the second time you've done that to me, Vanessa! It's just like you to leave me at a place like that. I need to reiterate something really quick- I HATE ENGLISH!!! Anyways, on with the Author's Note. Answer to your question, yes, orcs are pretty! Eheheh! Oh, its WWE smack down in Middle- Earth! You're a/N was rather...interesting. On with the story! A/N2: Umm...Vanessa here again. In case you were wondering, the 'Eheheh' thing was spelled right. On of our best friend, Narmeen, (who crossed over to the dark side, Klein High School not Klein Oak High School) came up with that. Because when she would write hehe it would always come out eheh. So, we have continued to do that in her honor. I just wanted to thank all the reviewers thus far: Lomadia/jereriviel: Thank you! Here's an update for you. DarkWitch: I'm glad Michelle agrees (he is pretty cute!) I think Christy e- mailed you with everything else. Thank you! Disclaimer: We own nothing. Sorry. "And stay away from my woman!" Pippin was yelling. His face was red, from the cold and from yelling at Gimli. "OK, I'm sorry," Gimli whimpered, a bit flustered by being told off by someone smaller and younger than himself. "Ah, poor sexy," Vanessa whispered maliciously to me, a dark smile playing at he lips, but I wasn't listening, as I was talking with Merry. "Would you do that for me?" I asked, pointing at Pippin telling Gimli off. "Yes," he whispered back. Then the implication hit him. "Who's been hitting on you?!" he demanded to know. "No one. I was just wondering," I answered flirtatiously. "Good, cuz you're all mine," he said kissing me. (As I have stated before, ME GUSTO!!) "Are you just going to stand there? Or are you coming on the quest?" Gandalf asked crossly. "Geez, someone's got a stick up their butt! What's his problem anyway?" I said in a sotto voice, only loud enough for Merry and Sam to hear. Sam laughed. "He's just jealous. Merry has you, Pippin has Vanessa, Strider has Arwen(ch), I bet Boromir and Legolas have ladies, Frodo likes someone back home, and I have Rosie (here he got a dreamy look on his face, then remembered where he was), and he and Gimli don't have lasses." (A/N: Was that a run-on sentence or what?! All well, I don't care! Your problem!) "That's probably true," I answered as Gimli ran past and said something about the walls of Moria and Gandalf commented about "their own masters can't even find them, blah, blah, blah" to which Legolas made a snide reply. "Why doesn't that surprise me?" he asked, rolling his eyes. Vanessa and I giggled. Soon Gandalf was sitting down in confusion. "I don't know how to open the bloody door!" he murmured. "'Speak, FRIEND, and enter'. What do you suppose that means?" Merry said pointedly to Gandalf. (A/N: Hey Merry does solve the riddle and I love that line so :P). "Mellon," said Gandalf. "Good job, young Meriadoc," he added grudgingly after the doors opened. "He he. You showed him!" I whispered, drawing a smile from him. "This is no mine. It's a tomb!" Boromir was saying in shock. "Get out of here!" We were backing out as the Watcher grabbed Frodo and dragged him out of Moria. "Ahhh!! Strider! Help me!" Frodo screamed and we all rushed out to help. A/N: Your turn! Take it away Nessie! A/N2: Howdy all! Why have we not been receiving any reviews? Maybe I should change the summary around a bit. But you guys need to read the first fic first to get this one. Maybe, maybe not. I dunno. Anyway, if anyone is reading this, would you mind reviewing? It would really make my day. PEACE! Yeah, that was directed to you George W. Bush. I still love you though! Not like that people. Sheesh. My stupid computer left a whole bunch of space here so I'm taking it up. Did you guys know that we wrote this at the beginning of the school year? Well sorta. So this is pretty old. I'm out of my Pippin stage and now I'm at Aragorn. We have already written a third the fourth story but they do not follow this plot line at all. The third was supposed to be a stand alone fic but we decided to write a sequel to it. Well, that's all the useless info I'm (Vanessa) going to give to you today. (Hehehe! I, Christy, have fixed that problem!) 


	12. Sweater Song

Chapter 12 A/N: Vanessa here. Christy, where was Pippin in that chapter? Oh well, you know he'll be in this one! I'm really mad at my sister so my chapter is going to be weird. Disclaimer: Nope; still not ours. "Frodo!!" Sam and I screamed. "Help him, Strider!" I yelled as he pulled out his pretty little sword. (A/N: Ahhh...Viggo...I mean Billy! Because Viggo is older than my parents. Oh well.) Legolas was also helping with his bow and arrow (Thanks Leggy!) Christy, me, and the other hobbits were being held back by Boromir as the others battled with the Watcher. The Watcher cried out in agony and dropped Frodo (whom Strider caught [very sexily]) and we ran into the mine/tomb and the door crumbled behind them. We were all trapped inside. Oh well, more Pippin time! (If you want to destroy my sweater, pull this tread as I walk away! [That's by Weezer]) (Dang it! I can't get into the mood with the radio on! Good bye hot men voices.) We walked for days, months, years...years? That can't be right. Oh! Stupid watch. We've only been walking for a few hours. "Pippin? Pippin?" I thought he was behind me and to my right but I felt the hand which I had grabbed and it did not feel right. It felt...hairy. "Milady, I've been yelled at by your "boyfriend" for coming onto you. I'm sure he would not approve," Gimli said and blushed. "Eeppp!!!" I squealed. "You're not Pippin! Ahhh!!! I'm scarred for life! Waahhh!!!" I looked ahead of me and to my left. There was Pippin. "What's going on?!" he asked furiously. He looked at Gimli and saw his hand on my shoulder. "Get off of her!!" he screamed at the dwarf. "She grabbed my hand!" he pleaded. "Vanessa? Is this true?" he asked with a hurt look upon his fair face. "Honestly, I thought he was you. I thought you were behind me. It was a mistake! Do you think I wanted to touch him?" "Yes," Christy said with a laugh. "Christy, you're not helping!" I hissed at her. "Pip, I swear, I thought he was you and I grabbed his, hairy, hand." "Alright," he gave Gimli a disapproving glare, "Come walk up here with me then." He gently glided me up towards the head of the line. "I don' trust him," pippin said to me when we were out of earshot of the dwarf. "I don't like the way he looks at you." "What?! Like I do?!" _~~*~~_ When we came to the three doors (down! Sorry, I love that band) place, Gandalf did his little "I have no memory of this place" line and we all sat down. Merry and Pippin still did their "Are we lost?" thing and Christy and I broke out laughing. Gandalf finally made up his mind about which way they should go, blah, blah, blah. Then Gimli spotted Balin's tomb and started bawling like a baby. What a wuss. Gandalf noticed a hefty book in the hands of a corpse. He began reading it aloud and handed Pippin his hat and staff (bad idea, Gandy!). While he was reading I noticed that Pip had headed off towards a dead body sitting upon a well. Right before he twisted the arrow I remembered what happened in the movie. (Have you ever seen me shimmy? It's not pretty. Sorry, I'm sick at home and I'm watching Kim Possible) "Wai-!" was all I managed to get out. Too late. The head fell, clanging all the way down. "Whoops," Christy said. "Fool of a Took!" "Hey, hey, hey!" I said. "It was an accident. Besides, he's my 'Fool of a Took'." "You can keep him," Christy mumbled. Boromir heard this and snickered. I gave Christy a dark look. She just smiled innocently. (OMG! I'm watching E!, and on this Rank I'm watching, Elijah was #9 on Players or Played Out. Eeee!!! He's so cute. Of course, I love my Billy too, but he's not under 25. Sorry Billy.) The whole incident with the cave troll and the orcs happened and Frodo was "miraculously" saved. So we're jogging/running because the drums had sounded. So we're on our merry little way when the goblins surrounded us. "Oh great! We're surrounded by creepy little people with really bad dental hygiene," I said. "It could be worse," Gimli commented. "There could be a balrog that we awoke." Just then there was a weird growling/rumbling noise and the end of our pathway lit up. "Thanks a lot Gimli!" Christy said sarcastically and threw her hands up. So Gandalf yelled at us to run and we made our way to the bridge of Khazad- Dûm. Legolas jumped across first and helped everyone else across (save Frodo and Strider). We ran a little bit and then we met the Balrog. He was funny looking; even funnier than in the movie. Soon Gandalf was all "You shall not pass!' and the Balrog got mad, fell, and took Gandy with him. "No!!!" Frodo and I shouted. "Oh, sorry Frodo, that was your line." We made it out of Moria and we all (well, most of us) fell broke down and cried over the loss of our dear friend. I tried to comfort Pippin who was quite distraught over this loss of the Istari and Christy did the same with Merry. Since Strider is so mean (and sexy) he made us leave and we made our way swiftly to Lothlórien. (A/N: I don't know if any of you care, but my parents are in a HUGE fight downstairs. I'm gonna leave this here and come back when he's gone. There he goes. My father has stormed out of the house and slammed the door. So once he was gone I snuck back down, retrieved the spiral and am now writing. Oh no, here's my mom. I should try and type softly so she doesn't hear me. Ok, it's a new day and I've locked myself in my room with my neighbor's laptop. She doesn't know I have it so shh... I hope no one comes up here and bothers me. I'm sorry for taking up all this room with my family problems. You guys don't deserve this. So here, take the remainder of my chapter as a token of my deepest apologies.) "I don't wanna meet the evil witch person!" I whined. "I don't want her to read my mind." "You have to have a mind first," Christy said. "Hey! Butt-munch." "Yeah, butt-munch," Pippin repeated. I just looked at him, confusion clearly written upon my face. "What? You said it." "Nice hobbit," I said, patting his head. "That's my line!" we heard from behind us. "Oh, crap, wait, you didn't hear that." "Gollum's so funny," Christy laughed. (Once again, I have taken upon the duties to brighten everyone's day) So a little while later (well, a lot later) we make it into Lórien and blah, blah, blah. "Stay close young hobbits!" Gimli said. "I'm not a hobbit," Christy complained. "Yeah! And you spit on me, Hairy," I whined. "Hairy?" Merry asked. "Didn't you ever see Snow White and the Seven Dwarves?" When my only response was silence, I remembered who I was talking to. "Right. Ask her later," I said and pointed at Christy. Then Haldir and his (sexy) elves showed up. "Helllooo..." I said, scooting closer towards the newcomer and his mates. "How are you today?" I asked seductively. "Ness! You have Pip. And you also had some fun while you two were mad at each other. This one's mine!" Christy grinned. She bumped me out of my place dangerously close to Haldir and took my spot. How rude! A/N: I'm tired. I'm going to bed. I've had the spiral for far too long. Its evil is taking over me! Noo!!!! Hehehe. I'm n full attack hobbit mode! Grr... *Drools* Ok, now that's gross. Even for me! Your turn Christy! Go team! We rock! Uh-huh! *Shakes butt* Sorry, I won't torment you like that anymore. Oh, by the way, have you guys seen the June cover of YM? Orlando's on it, but he has the goatee thing that he can't pull off. It's too bad. He would have been totally hot had he not have had the goatee and the fag shoes on. I'm really sorry all you Orlando fans, but I don't like what he did to him self. It's looks as though he forgot to shave and forgot how to dress himself. I know, I know, you hate me now right? Well, I'm an Orli lover too but he just CANNOT pull off the goatee. Anyway, thank you for reading, and don't forget to review. Peace. Once again, my computer is stupid. I want a new one but me parents already said no. Who needs them anyway? Well, I guess I do. Anyway, do you see that pretty little blue/purple button? Why don't you push that and tell me what you think. If you hate my little Disclaimer skits, I'll quit. Well, maybe not, it all depends on you guys. Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to read this meaningless fic. (And once again, I, Christy fixed it!! And the disclaimer skits had to be removed but if you want to see them just tell us in the review and we'll tell you how to find them.) 


	13. Midnight Playa Playa!

Chapter 13 A/N: Oooh...Haldir...eheheh! This is gonna be fun! Look out Lórien, Christy's on da loose and flirting! Disclaimer: Ok, so we still own nothing. "The very worst part of you is me" –Linkin Park 'Lying From You' Vanessa gave me a hurt look when I pushed her out of the way to get next to Haldir. "Hi," I said. "What are y'all (look out it's a southern elf! J PS: Vanessa thinks it's sexy!) doing in the woods of the Lady of Light?" "Our fellowship is in need of shelter. We have some from Rivendell and request to see the Lord and Lady," I said, turning on the (evil) puppy dog face that no one can resist. "Please?" "Fine, follow me," he ordered and turned to lead us. "Our fellowship is in your debt," Strider told Haldir. "And yours," Boromir whispered to me and gave me a (rare) smile. Seeing this, Merry quickly worked his way to my side. He put his arm around my waist and gave Boromir a pointed look. (A/N2: Umm...hi. This is Vanessa. I said I would try and make me A/N2 on Christy's chapters and A/N on mine. Anyway, as I was typing this part I started gagging. Christy, honey, you're one of my best friends, and you know I love you, but stop taking all my hot men from me! Grr... He he. You know I'm joking girl! But honestly, why do you get all the men. You can keep Merry, I don't want him, but why Pin Cushion Boi? Anyway, that's all I have to say). Ð¤Ð¤Ð "Caras Galadhon. The heart of elvendom on earth. Home to the Lord Celeborn and of Galadriel, Lady of the Light," Haldir told us, as we stopped for a rest, pointing to the elven city. (A/N: OK, I think I've seen the movie waaayyy too many times, I'm sitting in Biology and I can write these lines straight from the movie!) "Pretty," Vanessa whispered to me later as we were walking up the hundreds of stairs to see Celeborn. All of the guys seemed happy at seeing Galadriel. "Oh brother," Vanessa muttered. Then I heard Galadriel in my head. (Not another voice! Not another voice!) "Whoa! What are you thinking about?" "Nothing," I answered back. "That's the way my brain normally is." "Scary. Hey, that's my husband your thinking is good-looking! Haldir's mine too! You can have the short midget though." "Hey, you leave him alone! I'll kick your butt if you touch him! You can have Frodo." "Humph!" she said, sounding a little miffed and moved on to the next unsuspecting victim. Ð¤Ð¤Ð We were all snuggling down to sleep; I was next to Merry of course. Soon I heard Merry's even breathing and little snoring. "He's so cute," I thought, snuggling even closer. Then I heard someone approaching. I looked and saw Haldir. "Will you come walk with me, milady?" he asked. I looked around and saw no one else awake. "Sure. I can't sleep anyways," I told him as he helped me up. "Isn't it beautiful tonight?" I asked. "Aye," he agreed, "but not as beautiful as you." "OK, sure," I said, raising my eyebrows. "It's also cold!" I complained as a breeze blew by. "Here," he said, putting his cloak around my shoulders. "Thank you," I smiled, giving him a peck on the cheek. Then I heard something that sounded like a hobbit moving around the campsite. I faked a yawn, "Thank you for walking with me, but I'm sleepy now." "Yes, and I am going on guard now, good-night," ha said and kissed me deeply. "Ooo..., elves do kiss well! I can see why Kits is so in love with Legolas now!" I thought as I stumbled back into camp and to my bedroll. I snuggled with Merry again and gave him a kiss good-night that was, unexpectedly, returned. "Where did you go?" he asked quietly. "I couldn't sleep so I went on a walk, but now I'm back and I can sleep. Good-night." I kissed him again. "Good-night, love," he replied, as we fell asleep in each other's arms. A/N: This is fun...Merry and Haldir?! Hehehe. I love being a fanfic writer. Controlling hot guys is really fun! Your turn Nessie! Gooo...Nessa! Have fun! A/N2: Surprisingly, I don't have anything to say except...Christy?! How dare you try and move in on my Craig Parker??!! He's much too beautiful for you! Hehe. You know I'm joking. The only guys I can pick up are Steve-o and Vincent. Joy... Anyway, the next chapter is in my POV. (Naw, Craig IS mine!!!) 


	14. Discussions and a Spiffy Belt

Chapter 14

A/N: Why did you get Haldir? I want him too!! I think I will get him. Well, maybe not. But believe you me; I _will _get another man by the end of this fic. Ha ha he he. *Insert evil laughter here* *Shakes butt* Hello? Yeah, umm…yeah. Onward ho!

Disclaimer: Do I really have to? I think by now you know that this belongs to the almighty Tolkien. And no, I still have not caught those pesky elves. But I will someday!

Legolas: *leans against a tree* No you won't.

Me: Yes I will. Where did the tree come from?

Haldir: I brought it.

Me: Why?  
Haldir: Because I felt like it.

Me: …

Haldir: It reminds me of home.

Me and Legolas: -.-

Haldir: What? I miss my mommy!!

Legolas: Me too!!!

Haldir and Legolas: *crying hysterically on each other's shoulder*

Me: Right… I think I'll leave you two alone.

Haldir and Legolas: Mommy!!

The next morning Pip awoke with a start. Someone had kicked him. It happened again.

"Pip!" Merry whispered and kicked him again.

"Uhh…What?" he yawned.

"We need o talk."

"It's too early. We can talk in the morning. Besides," he points at me. "I can't just wake her up, she's tired too."

"Pippin," I grumbled. "Just go. You know how persistent he is. He won't leave you alone until you go with him."

"Alright," he said, giving me a kiss. "Go back to sleep, I'll be back soon."

Merry and Pippin went off to a somewhat secluded area so they could talk in private. 

"Pippin, I don't think Christy loves me anymore. I saw her go off with that elf, Haldir or something, last night. She kissed him! What did I do to make her do that?!"

"She kissed him?! You must have done something to make her mad," Pippin said. "I'll try talking to Vanessa tonight. I'm sure Christy will have told her everything."

"Thank you, cousin," Merry said, patting Pippin's back and heading back to camp. He felt better; he would know everything by nightfall.

"Is everything OK?" I asked, rolling over a little bit so Pippin could lie down and I could lie on top of him again.

"For now," he answered, playing with my hair. "Go back to sleep, you still have a few hours left."

A few hours later I was awaken by Strider instead of Pippin. I opened my eyes and found 8 eyes staring back at me (Pippin, Strider, Gimli, and Christy). "What?"

"You were screaming in your sleep," Christy answered.

"Again?! I thought I had stopped." Ever since I was 8 (this is true) I have had this dream but I can't remember it. I always wake up screaming. "I'm alright, guys. I'm alright."  
"Are you sure?" Strider asked me, doubtfully.

"Yeah, I'm just a little shaken up."

"It's OK now," Pippin said, sitting next to me and putting him arms around me.

The others walked away and I laid my head against Pippin. (I wanna go home! I'm in my Algebra class trying to "finish" my homework. This looks like math, right?)

Two hours later we were ready to leave the evil witch/moth/demon/evil Lady's home. (A/N: Don't ask about the moth thing. It's an inside joke)

"On the road again! Something, something, something da da da da da! I don't know the words but I don't care! Because I'm on the road again!"

"Vanessa…shut…up!" Christy said through clenched teeth. "You're going to drive me insane!"

"Even more than you are now?" I asked helpfully.

"Yes! Now shut up."

"OK." I was silent.

About two minutes later we heard someone humming the song.

"Vanessa…"

"What?! It's not me! Honest!"

"Tis I! Gimli, son of Glóin, son of…"

"That's great, but a little more than we needed to know. You could've stopped after 'Tis I!'" I said.

"Oh, well. Tis I! It's a very catchy tune."

Then the mean old moth-lady gave the fellowship their gifts and walked up to Christy and I. She kept on walking.

"Umm…hey…yeah. You kind of forgot some people," I called after her.

"You aren't part of the fellowship. You don't get anything."

"We are too!" Christy yelled defensively.

"Oh, fine. Here, take a belt or something."

"Yeah, thanks," I mumbled.

"Whatever," and she walked away and got inside her spiffy swan boat.

"I really don't like her," I said to Pippin.

"On the road again!" Gimli started to sing again.

"Shut up!!!" everyone (save Gimli) shouted.

A/N: I'm sorry it was so bad. But you said you wanted this and I couldn't think. And also I'm watching Sweet Home Alabama in yearbook. It's pretty good so far. Anyways, your turn. Gooo…Christy! Cheerleader mode button was pushed by John last period. I wish Vincent would stop following me. It's getting kinda creepy. Whatever, I hope you guys review. I didn't think this chapter was THAT bad. :P


	15. Evil Plans

Chapter 14 A/N: Why did you get Haldir? I want him too!! I think I will get him. Well, maybe not. But believe you me; I will get another man by the end of this fic. Ha ha he he. *Insert evil laughter here* *Shakes butt* Hello? Yeah, umm...yeah. Onward ho! Disclaimer: Do I really have to? I think by now you know that this belongs to the almighty Tolkien. The next morning Pip awoke with a start. Someone had kicked him. It happened again. "Pip!" Merry whispered and kicked him again. "Uhh...What?" he yawned. "We need to talk." "It's too early. We can talk in the morning. Besides," he points at me. "I can't just wake her up, she's tired too." "Pippin," I grumbled. "Just go. You know how persistent he is. He won't leave you alone until you go with him." "Alright," he said, giving me a kiss. "Go back to sleep, I'll be back soon." Merry and Pippin went off to a somewhat secluded area so they could talk in private. "Pippin, I don't think Christy loves me anymore. I saw her go off with that elf, Haldir or something, last night. She kissed him! What did I do to make her do that?!" "She kissed him?! You must have done something to make her mad," Pippin said. "I'll try talking to Vanessa tonight. I'm sure Christy will have told her everything." "Thank you, cousin," Merry said, patting Pippin's back and heading back to camp. He felt better; he would know everything by nightfall. "Is everything OK?" I asked, rolling over a little bit so Pippin could lie down and I could lie on top of him again. "For now," he answered, playing with my hair. "Go back to sleep, you still have a few hours left." A few hours later I was awaken by Strider instead of Pippin. I opened my eyes and found 8 eyes staring back at me (Pippin, Strider, Gimli, and Christy). "What?" "You were screaming in your sleep," Christy answered. "Again?! I thought I had stopped." Ever since I was 8 (this is true) I have had this dream but I can't remember it. I always wake up screaming. "I'm alright, guys. I'm alright."  
  
"Are you sure?" Strider asked me, doubtfully. "Yeah, I'm just a little shaken up." "It's OK now," Pippin said, sitting next to me and putting him arms around me. The others walked away and I laid my head against Pippin. (I wanna go home! I'm in my Algebra class trying to "finish" my homework. This looks like math, right?) Two hours later we were ready to leave the evil witch/moth/demon/evil Lady's home. (A/N: Don't ask about the moth thing. It's an inside joke) "On the road again! Something, something, something da da da da da! I don't know the words but I don't care! Because I'm on the road again!" "Vanessa...shut...up!" Christy said through clenched teeth. "You're going to drive me insane!" "Even more than you are now?" I asked helpfully. "Yes! Now shut up." "OK." I was silent. About two minutes later we heard someone humming the song. "Vanessa..." "What?! It's not me! Honest!" "Tis I! Gimli, son of Glóin, son of..." "That's great, but a little more than we needed to know. You could've stopped after 'Tis I!'" I said. "Oh, well. Tis I! It's a very catchy tune." Then the mean old moth-lady gave the fellowship their gifts and walked up to Christy and I. She kept on walking. "Umm...hey...yeah. You kind of forgot some people," I called after her. "You aren't part of the fellowship. You don't get anything." "We are too!" Christy yelled defensively. "Oh, fine. Here, take a belt or something." "Yeah, thanks," I mumbled. "Whatever," and she walked away and got inside her spiffy swan boat. "I really don't like her," I said to Pippin. "On the road again!" Gimli started to sing again. "Shut up!!!" everyone (save Gimli) shouted. A/N: I'm sorry it was so bad. But you said you wanted this and I couldn't think. And also I'm watching Sweet Home Alabama in yearbook. It's pretty good so far. Anyways, your turn. Gooo...Christy! Cheerleader mode button was pushed by John last period. I wish Vincent would stop following me. It's getting kinda creepy. Whatever, I hope you guys review. I didn't think this chapter was THAT bad. :P 


	16. Aftermath

Chapter 16 A/N: Thanks a lot Christy! You hurt my feelings! Waaahhhh!! I need a shoulder to cry on. Oh Billy! If not, oh Elijah! If not, oh Viggo! OK, whatever. Onward ho! (Not like that!) Disclaimer: Yeah, I should hope that by now you can tell the difference between Tolkien's work and ours. I cleaned off Christy's "masterpiece" from my face with some water from a nearby creek. It really didn't want to come off, but I scrubbed. I'm like scrubbing bubbles! After I cleaned my face I headed back to camp. Strider and Christy snickered at me when I walked back. "What?" "You left the hair," she replied before bursting out laughing. "Oh. Haha. Very funny," I said sarcastically. I undid and redid my hair in a ponytail and sat down with everyone for breakfast. "That's better," Pippin said to me as I sat down next to him. "Yeah. No thanks to Christy." "What?! Merry said I didn't do it." "I'm watching you," I said and gave her the stink eye. She smiled at me and I gave her my now famous possessed chipmunk face. "I'm afraid to even ask," Strider commented next to me. I was quite happy with the placement of the guys; Pippin on my right, and Strider on my left. Life was good. "Smart choice. Very smart choice," I agreed. I looked up at Strider and he looked at me. Pippin coughed and put his arm around my waist. "When are we leaving?" "In a few hours so we can plan our trail," Boromir answered. I think he needs to take a bath. "Good. That will give us time to bathe," I said, looking at the man. He was dirty. We all finished breakfast (A/N: Stupid Daniel. He won't stop text messaging me! ) Pippin and I went on a walk. "We're getting pretty far away," I said. "Shouldn't we be heading ba-" I was cut off by Pippin's lips Twenty minutes later the others were getting worried because Pip and I still hadn't come back. "Go look for them," Strider said to Gimli. He grumbled about it but in the end he went in search of us. "Wait,' I said to Pippin. "I though I heard someone." "I'm sure you didn't," he answered and kissed me again. I pushed him away. "I think it's about time we left," I said uncertainly. "Huzzah!" Gimli yelled, jumping out from behind a bush. "Tis I! I have come to save you, young maiden." "Umm...thanks. But I don't need saving." "Not you! Him!" he shouted, pointing at Pippin. "Pip?!" I asked. "Sí, Señorita. Tis him I want." "Run Pippin! I think he's drunk!" He ran as fast as his short little legs would carry him back to the camp, with Gimli following the whole time. According to him, dwarves are deadly over short distances. Yeah, right, and I'm the devil. I walked back to camp alone and was surprised to find crawled up in the fetal position and Boromir was sitting on Gimli. "What happened?!" "It was horrible!" Pippin cried. "He...he...he...tried to kiss me!" "Eeewww!!! Gross!!! Poor baby. Are you OK?" I asked, running over to him and holding his hand. "I'm OK now," he said looking up at me. "I think I'm gonna hurl," Christy said. "Hey! That hairy/drunk/stoned dwarf just tried to kiss my hobbit. I gotta see if he's OK." "Yeah, sure, and I've never kissed Merry before," Christy replied sarcastically and rolled her eyes. "But...I saw you guys..." Boromir started. "Oh, right, I get it now." "Aren't you smart?" I sighed. "Where's my hobbit lass?!" Gimli wailed. "He's not right," Sam whispered to Frodo. Strider, who was getting fed up with the problems the dwarf was causing, got up and slapped him right in the face. Gimli slurred, blinked stupidly, and began to cry (quite loudly at that!). "Waahhh!! Nobody loves me!" "I wonder why," I whispered. "No one wants to love a short, hairy man. Not even Mummsie! She never loved me either! Waahhh!!" This time it was my turn to hit the dwarf. "Shut up you whiny baby!" He quit crying/blubbering immediately. "Are we ready to go?" I asked. Everyone was staring at me open-mouthed and gaping. "What?" "Nothing. Let's go," Strider said and smiled at me. So we continued up (or down) the river in the spiffy little boats. Everyone sat in the same boats with the same people. Nothing really interesting happened save the fact that Gimli, Legolas, and Boromir's boat tipped over (courtesy of the dwarf. Man, I really hate that guy!). We made camp that night on shore. Gimli kept making faces at me every time I came too near or touched Pippin. What a weirdo. It really wasn't that cold that night but Pippin insisted that we share a bed roll. Whatever. At least he's cute. We set up our bed a little ways away from the rest of the fellowship which I thought was odd because we wouldn't be as protected. When both of us were situated and comfortable, Pippin started kissing me (as if I could object!). "That guy, Gimli, really scares me," he said. "I don't like the way he looks at us. It's creepy." "Yeah, well, he's a creepy guy. I try just to ignore him." "Vanessa?" he asked me. "Why do you stare at Strider? He's much too old for you." "You sound like Christy. I don't know, I don't think I stare at him. I stare at you though," I grinned but he didn't return it. "Do you like him more than me?" "Of course not! Listen, don't worry about all those other guys. Just stop. Everything's fine," I said. "Good-night. It's late and we need to get some sleep." I turned away so I wouldn't have to look at him right then but he turned me back over. "Good-night, Vanessa," and he kissed me again. He held me close to him the whole night. It was nice but I wasn't cold. Plus it was impossible to think with arms around me like that. The next morning Christy came over to Pippin and my bedroll. "Ready to eat? Strider wants to leave early today." "Urr...yeah. I'm up. I'll get him up and ready too. Save us a plate please," I said, stretching. "Pip? Pip? Pip!" I pushed him but he didn't wake. "Let me do it," Merry said, walking over to his cousin holding a piece of bacon and waving it under his nose. "Mmmm...food." He jumped up, nearly stepping on me, and grabbing the bacon. "Thank you, Merry," I said as he walked of. A/N: There. Done. Your turn Christy. Sorry it was so long and boring but it's y'alls problem now. Have fun! Also, please don't forget to review. I almost had a heart attack when I saw how many favorites lists we were on. 4!! I couldn't believe it. Since we only have 7 reviews and all. Thank you guys so much for making that possible. Plus if any of you guys read romances (well, Legolas romances and soon to be a Haldir fic also) check out my stuff. My pen name is Tap-dancing Hobbit. Don't be a stranger y'all!! :P 


	17. Sickness

Chapter 17 A/N: Well, here's the fic. What to write, write to write? Christy's POV. A/N2: Uh! So tired. I'm banging this out at 3 AM and all I want to do is sleep. But no. You guys won't leave me alone! All you want is another chapter. He he. You know I love you all! Here, have a cookie. I have plenty. Disclaimer: I should hope that you can tell who belongs to Tolkien by now. "Row, row, row your boat," I started to sing, in time the oars I was rowing. I stopped when Vanessa gave me a look. "Stop! Do you want Gimli to hear and begin singing again?" "Actually I think he sings quite well. And we should have a canon between the boats, I start, then Strider, then Legolas," I replied jokingly. "Besides, he doesn't bug me. You're the one with the "hobbit lass" that he wants!" I ducked as I said this because Vanessa looked as though she was going to slap me. That is until Pippin told her it was her turn to row. "Remember, Nessa. It's 'Row, row, row your boat', not 'Kill, kill, kill your friend'!" Merry said, chuckling at his own little joke. "But I like that song!" she protested. She was quiet a moment then sang, "Kill, kill, kill the dwarf!" drawing a laugh from all of us. (A/N: Dom...Dom...ooohhhh...Me gusto! Sorry, I'm writing while looking at my pic of him) Ð¤Ð¤Ð I'm hungry! And I'm sore!" Pippin yelled to Strider, halfway through his turn to row. "He woke me up with his yelling," I complained quietly to Merry. "I know, love, he woke me up too," he whispered back. "Pull onto shore for a rest," Strider yelled. I saw his muscles bulge as he rowed to the bank. (A/N2: Oh, nice mental picture!) My boat reached the shore first (both hobbits decided to row). I watched Legolas's muscles- they were HUGE! "It's late, anyways, we shall rest here for tonight," Strider announced after conversing with Boromir. "Christy and I will take first watch tonight," Merry volunteered. "Thanks," I told him, rolling my eyes, "you just know I don't want to sleep tonight." "All they're going to be watching tonight is each other," Vanessa accused us loudly. "So? Your point?" Merry asked. "Christy, you've rubbed off too much on him," Pippin told me. "And I've rubbed off on you, little mister (A/N: Don't ask me, I don't know)," Vanessa said, while the fellowship laughed. "Anyway, Pippin and I will take second watch." "I will take third watch!" Gimli offered. "Uh-oh. He won't be watching anything but you!" I whispered to Vanessa. "I know; scary!" She shivered. "Ugh!" _~~*~~_ "This is boring! Nothing is happening! I'm not having any fun! You know how cranky I get when I'm not having any fun!" I complained. "Why'd you volunteer us?!" "I don't know. I guess we could do what Vanessa suggested and 'only watch each other', he whispered and kissed me. "Sounds good to me," I mumbled. (A/N2: Christy? Why weren't you watching for mean people instead of kissing that stupid hobbit?! =P) Soon it was time to awaken Vanessa and Pippin for their watch, but Vanessa didn't want to wake up, neither did Pippin. "You take Vanessa, I'll wake Pip," Merry told me and I nodded my assent. "Hey, Vanessa," I whispered in her ear. "Do you want me to tell Pippin all about your obsession with Frodo and Strider?" "Nooo!!!" she yelled, sitting up and in the process awaking Pippin. "Didn't think so," I told her and saw that Vanessa's scream had scared Pippin awake. "Well, how about that: 2 birds with 1 stone." I smiled at Merry, "I guess you won't have to wake Pip up after all!" "Nay," he chuckled, "guess I won't." I yawned, then, and struggled to stay awake. "It's bed time for you, love," Merry told me as he led me to our bedroll. I lay down and snuggled next to him and fell asleep. The next thing I knew, it was time to get up, and Merry kissed me awake. "Rise and shine!" he told me cheerfully. "I'll rise but I won't shine!" I groaned grumpily. "Oh, come ON!" Vanessa commented. "Everyone else is up." "Whatever. But I hold to my earlier statement!" I told the fellowship as Merry handed me my breakfast. "Uhh," I groaned again. "I think I'm sick!" A/N: Sorry, I do feel kinda sick. Tomorrow is V-day and I have no one to share it with! I'm so depressed! Your turn, Nessie! What happens next? I must know, so tell me! A/N2: Alright, first off, you feel depressed?! All I have to share it with is Vincent and Steve-o! Can we say creepy? Yes, creepy. Hehe. Anyway, the next chapter will be up soon, I think it's one of the last! 


	18. What the Problem Be?

**Chapter 18**

**A/N**: We're going to end this soon because we have almost 20 chapters. I don't know what to write. Oh well, not my problem! Oh, crap, wait, yes it is! Poop. Anyway, here we go! **Nessa's POV.**

**Disclaimer**: We only own what you don't recognize. Still, no one has guessed who just about everything belongs to. Come on people, if you don't guess, I'll be forced to give the cookies to the elves. We know how that ended earlier.

Haldir: *Grins sheepishly*

Legolas: I want a cookie!

Me: No.

Legolas: Why?

Me: Because Sparky over there already gave you one a few chapters ago.

Legolas: Oh.

Haldir: Can I have the cookie? I haven't had one yet.

Me: No.

Haldir: Pwease?

Me: No.

Haldir: I'll take my shirt of for you…

Me: Ok!

Legolas: NO!! I want the cookie! 

Haldir: No, you already had one.

Legolas: So? I still want one.

Me: People, we can settle this.

Haldir: How?  
Me: We give the cookie to Strider.

Christy really didn't look well when she woke up this morning so we decided to wait a little until we left. Merry stayed with Christy the whole time…it was sickening.

"Is she going to die?" Pippin asked me on our walk together.

"No! No, she just having a stomach ache. Nothing serious."

"Oh, that's good," he said, sounding relieved. "I don't want her to die."

"I do! No, I'm just kidding. I don't want anyone to do die…yet. Well, except Gimli."

We continued with our walk. I don't know if you would really call it a walk because we spent a good bit of time making out but we were in the woods.

"I'm going…to get more wood," Gimli said.

"We don't need any, we're leaving soon," Strider replied.

"Oh, well, then I'm going to the bathroom."

"Do NOT go following Vanessa and Pippin," Boromir groaned. "Leave them alone."

"What?! That's preposterous! I would _never_."

"Yes you would," everyone said in a monotone voice.

He got up anyway and headed towards the woods where Pip and I were. He followed the trail he thought we were most likely to have taken. He knew he had the right one when he heard voices.

"We should be heading back. I want to see how Christy is doing," I said.

"Five more minutes, please?" he begged.

"Two."

"Three?"

"Oh alright," I gave in. It's not like I was being tortured or anything, just kissing.

Gimli followed our voices, anxious to see what exactly we were up to. He was quite surprised though when he saw Pip had pinned me to a tree, kissing me. "What are you kids doing?!"

Pippin, frightened by the newcomer, let go of me and said, "Umm…nothing."

"I'm not a kid!" I whined. "Neither is he."

"Come on, let's go. I'm taking you back to camp."

"No," I commanded and crossed my arms across my chest. "I'm 14 years old and I can make my own decisions."

"You're only 14?!" Gimli asked incredulously. "You're still a baby!"

"No I'm not. In 4 years I'll be considered an adult."

"Come on, I'm taking both of you back," he said and grabbed my arm.

"Let go of me! Rape! Rape! Pippin, help me!"

Gimli ended up taking, well dragging, me back to camp and handed me over to Strider. "I caught them doing things in the woods," he stated proudly.

"So?" he asked, unmoved by this news. "I knew they were doing something. But, didn't I tell you not to follow them?"

"Well, yes. But aren't you glad I did?"

"No. You see, they're at it already. You should not have followed them, Gimli."

Pippin had walked over to me and tapped me on the shoulder while Gimli and Strider were arguing. We started kissing almost immediately.

"Aren't you going to stop them?!" Gimli cried.

"No. I see no harm in it."

I smiled. I needed to thank that Ranger one of these days. Gimli scoffed and walked away. I gave the man a 'thank-you-for-saving-my-butt' kind of look and continued with Pippin.

(A/N: My gosh! That was horrid to write. The whole time I was wishing it were Strider in my arms, not Pippin)

Christy said she was feeling better at around noon so we packed up and left.

"Making my way downtown, walking fast, faces past…" I started singing.

"Make it stop! Make it stop! The horror! The horror!" Gimli complained.

"Oh shut up!" Pippin and I said in perfect sync.

"Vanessa," Christy said to me. "Like I said before, you're rubbing off way too much on that hobbit."

I smiled. It was true. Pippin, and all of the hobbits, had changed so much ever since Christy and I had shown up in the Shire.

The day passed and nothing interesting happened. I still thought Christy looked sick but she insisted that she was OK.

Aragorn decided it was time to rest so we pulled the boats to shore and set up camp. I tried _really hard not to look at Strider while he pulled in the boats but I couldn't help myself. He was so muscular and grungy that I couldn't stop staring._

Christy looked at me and smiled evilly. I looked away. "_He he he_," she thought. "_That is going to come in handy someday_."

It got late and we all either went to bed or went on watch. I snuggled up next to Pippin and Christy did the same with Merry.

I didn't know what time, but I awoke some time during the night and Strider and Frodo were on watch together. Just the two I didn't want to look at. I tried going back to sleep but it wasn't going to happen.

I got up, carefully not to wake up Pip, and walked over to the two guys who were both sitting upon a rock looking out. I guess I had snuck on Frodo because he was a little frightened when I tapped him on his shoulder. "Hi, I couldn't sleep."

"Oh," he said and made room for me to sit down.

**A/N**: I'm tired. I hope you guys liked this chapter. I know it wasn't my best but right now I don't care. Sorry, it was a pretty crappy day. Oh, BTW, that song belongs to Vanessa Carlton. Gooo…Christy!


	19. Fin

**Chapter 19**

**A/N**: Ow! Alex hurt me! (My friend Alex, not my crush). I wanted you to tell me why I was sick cuz I don't know. This will be the last chappie; all good things must come to an end. But don't worry, we already have another fic in the works of being typed. **Christy's POV.**

**A/N2:** Yeah, well, this is the last chapter for this story. Our next fic was supposed to be a stand alone fic but our friend was all 'You have to write a sequel!' so we wrote that, its sequel, and we're currently writing the sequel's sequel. Anyway, here's the frickin' disclaimer.

**Disclaimer:** We only own what you do not recognize from Tolkien's beautiful books.

Legolas: So…*steps closer to me* what are you doing Friday night?

Me: No, I will not give you the cookie if you go out with me.

Legolas: Doah! (Think Homer Simpson)

Haldir: Ha ha. Let me show you how it's done. Vanessa, you look nice today.

Me: F*** off. Leggo-boi already tried.

Haldir: What if I said 'I love you'?

Me: Hmm…close, but not quite.

Haldir: Fine. You leave me no choice. Please! Please! Pleeeeaassssseeeee!!!

Me: Nope.

Legolas: *Grins* I told you it wouldn't work.

Me: It would have if he had taken his shirt off for me.

Legolas and Haldir: *Run up and tear their shirts off.

Me: I can see we're going to need more cookies! *Hands them each a half*

I awoke the next morning still feeling kinda woozy. I didn't want to tell anyone or make a big deal about it, but Merry could tell.

"What's wrong, love?" he asked me. "Are you still feeling bad?"

"Naw, I'm fine. It's probably Frodo's cooking," I told him, struggling to sit up.

"No, no lay down!" he demanded, gently pushing me back down. "You're getting breakfast in bed (or should I say bedroll?) today!" Then he left without giving me time to argue.

"Uh," I groaned and fell asleep again.

"Where's Christy?" Vanessa demanded to know when she saw merry fixing 2 plates and preparing to walk off.

"She's getting breakfast in bed today," he answered shortly and walked off.

"How come you never do that for me?" Vanessa pouted to Pippin.

All she got in response was Pippin glaring daggers at Merry's back.

Ж¤Ж¤Ж

"Wake up, gorgeous," Merry whispered in my ear.

"Umm…I'm up! I'm up!" I said trying not only to convince Merry, but myself. "Oh, no I'm not!" I gave up, burying my head in my pillow.

"Oh no you don't! If I have to be up, _you_ have to be up!" he argued, put down the food and tried to get me to sit up.

"But you don't _have to be up!" I argued back and tickled him._

"Stop! Stop! OK! I give up! You win!" he laughed. He lay back down and wrapped his arms around me. "I'm sorry you don't feel well." All he received was snoring and he soon joined me in la-la-land.

♫♫♫

"Hey! Wake up!" Vanessa and Pippin yelled.

"Huh?" I asked blearily. As the 2 came into focus, I realized they were mad. "Uh…Merry, you might want to wake up." That didn't work so I tickled him.

"Ahh!! What?" I pointed. "Oh, what do y'all want?"

"Eat your breakfast and get ready to go! We've been waiting for over an hour. No one wanted to come right away because we figured you were being naughty. But then you didn't show up, so Pippin and I came looking. Lo and behold, we found you! Now get your last bums up!" Vanessa lectured us, and they left.

"Well, the good news is, I feel better!" I smiled at Merry.

Ж¤Ж¤Ж

"Long have I desired to look upon the kings of old," Strider was telling us and pointing at the Argonath. Apparently, they were related (duh!).

Soon it was the general consensus that we should rest at Amon Hen, which we were soon approaching.

Ж¤Ж¤Ж

**(A/N [Christy]:** I don't know what to write! Ahhh! I'm also supposed to be in bad, but that is beside the point! I also need to work on my solo fic, but that's irrelevant at the moment. "Come hell or high blood pressure, I'll finish it!" to quote Sherman Potter (from M*A*S*H). "Come what may, I will love you till my dying day!" Oh, wait, now's not a good time to daydream about Dom! Gotta write! But I don't want to leave Merry again! I do in every single fic! It's getting annoying! Well, back to the story. We now return you to your regularly scheduled fanfic!)

**(A/N2 [Vanessa]:** Jesus, Christy! You made me type all of that! You are so mean to me. Anyway, I just wanted to say how hard it was for me to type all of that. Every time Merry said 'Love' I wanted to chunk the computer out the window! Sheesh, it's gross! Anyway, onwards we go!)

"Do you think we have enough wood yet?" I asked Merry. Strider had, innocently, sent us to fetch some wood. Big mistake!

"Yep!" he said, putting his bundle down and I did the same to mine. We sat down. "I love you," he whispered in my ear before kissing me.

*Want to vanish inside your kiss* I thought/sang to myself. "I love you too," I whispered back, losing myself inside his kisses. Soon we heard some rustling.

"We better head back now," Merry told me.

"I don't wanna!" I protested, acting like a spoiled brat. Then it occurred to me that the rustling might have been an Uruk-hai. "Alright, I give up. I guess we should."

We got back in time to hear Gimli grumbling about dwarves not needing to recover strength. "We're deadly killing machines!" he complained loudly.

"Yeah, one whiff of his breath and everyone keels over dead!" I whispered, only loud enough for Merry, Pippin, and Vanessa to hear.

"Where's Frodo?" asked Merry.

"Uh-oh!" I said to Vanessa. "The fun begins now!" we were being torn. We didn't know if we should warn them about what was going to happen; we decided not to. I kissed Merry again, Vanessa doing the same to Pippin. I hoped it wouldn't be the last time I kissed him!

We followed Merry and pippin to the little bush that they hid in. Soon we saw Frodo hide behind the tree. Next thing I knew Pippin had dragged Vanessa out into the path in attempts to try and get Frodo to stay. Merry and I followed. Merry told Frodo to run and we led the Uruk-hai away.

We reached a clearing and the Uruk-hai surrounded us. Boromir rushed in and fought bravely. About half of them paid attention to him. The other half were more concerned with Vanessa and me.

"Women-folk," said a particularly ugly one. "I wants them!" he yelled, making a grab for me. Another tried to catch Vanessa. We backed away and fell, finding not forest, but carpet under our hands.

"We're back!" I muttered unhappily.

"Hey! We may not be with our men, but we also don't have those Uruk-hai after us anymore!"

"True," I answered melancholy.

"Hey, by the way, happy birthday."

"Thanks," I smiled.

Ж¤Ж¤Ж

**Epilog thingamabob**

Boromir was still killed by Lurtz and Lurtz still got his butt kicked by Aragorn. Frodo and Sam started on their way to Mordor and Merry and Pippin were still captured. It didn't seem like much had changed, but the hobbits had. They knew Christy and Vanessa might come and help them in their dire need; which did happen. But that's another story.

**A/N:** Sorry the ending sux, but I haven't had any caffeine in my system yet. Our next fanfic is not about the aforementioned foreshadowing; that will come later. Don't worry we won't leave you hanging, we're not THAT evil! Well, maybe I am…Eheheh.

**A/N2:** Well, what did you think? I dunno, I think out best story is the one after the next one. But you guys will have to wait a bit before that comes! Anyway, look for our next crazy thing around Monday or even this weekend if my dad lets me. Anyway, please review because we enjoy receiving them!

Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and kept up with our stories this far. We love you!!


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